Who Moved My Ease?

How to reduce attention spam and find more lightness in uncomfortable times.

If you’re feeling like the world is broken, you’re not alone. Sometimes it feels like humanity is going backwards, that we’re not learning what we need to learn, and the world keeps getting weirder as a result. We live in uncomfortable times. The feeling of stress and strain is all around us — magnified by the ever-increasing pace of change. What can we do to find more ease and lightness?

For starters, we can accept reality and not let that break us. Despite much evidence to the contrary, the world isn’t broken. We are not broken. Yes, the world is changing, rapidly. We’re all feeling the strain and we’re seeing the impact on our friends, families, communities, businesses, systems, governments, and the world. It can be distressing and exhausting. And, we all know that we can’t simply go back to the way things were “before,” whatever that even means. We need a new way of being.

We can create an environment where people can live and work with purpose, balance, and abundance. We can be healthy, joyful, peaceful, and kind. We can find ease and lightness, even in uncomfortable times. I know we can. But, to do that we need to adopt a new way of being. We need to heal ourselves and start showing up differently, individually and collectively. Let’s start by addressing attention spam.

Attention Spam

Here’s something that “moved my ease” recently: Collectively, humans are making dumb decisions, faster, with the attention span of a fish. To be clear, different research puts our attention span at either 47 seconds or 8 seconds, the latter of which is less than a fish. IDK, I couldn’t pay attention long enough to figure it out. (Squirrel!) Whatever the case, it’s too close to fish territory to be good. You’re welcome.

This matters for obvious reasons, but even more so in combination with how stressed we are as humans today. Some of our responses to our environment are hardwired, our stress response being one (aka fight, flight, or freeze). Given the ever-increasing amount of change we experience, this poses a significant challenge, considering…

• Our stress response is programmed into the most primitive part of our brain, the part that controls our survival instinct.

• Our “lizard brain” doesn’t see a difference between real and perceived threats.

• Our brain believes our thoughts (true or not) because it creates them.

• Our brain prefers the known to the unknown, so change is a perceived threat.

• Our stress response prioritizes physical escape (safety) over mental capacity.

• Prolonged stress, without a reset, negatively effects us physically and mentally.

So, let’s recap all that a little differently. Death, change, and annoying work emails = same threat; biological threat response = same; change = constant; and stress impacts our health and reduces our cognitive function. By cognitive function, we’re talking memory, concentration, processing, and decision-making. So… yeah. Not great.

Now, for giggles, let’s factor in the pace of change and our diminishing attention span. Given there’s some debate on attention span stats, we can take the fish bit with a grain of salt… or saltwater. But, the fact that our attention span is even close to a fish is enough to be awkward and embarrassing for us humans (IMO).

What do we do about this, friends? We reclaim our attention span – slow down, notice, ponder, take breaks, reduce distractions, avoid multi-tasking, meditate, breath mindfully, get enough sleep, and exercise. That’s how it’s done. It’s also time to get serious about managing stress. Change is constant, but stress doesn’t need to be. Good news! All of those things help reduce stress too. We can also benefit by taking a page out of Ice Cube’s playbook: “check yo’ self before you wreck yo’ self.” Sage advice. Never gets old.

Check Yo’ Beliefs

Clearly, we’re not stopping to think about much in the moment. (Yet! I have faith in us.) This begs the question: when we’re moving fast and stressed, how are we making decisions? We’re reacting based on our beliefs. Whether consciously or unconsciously, our decisions are influenced by our beliefs. Beliefs affect our reactions, experience, mindset, behaviors, and how we see ourselves and others. New experiences are filtered through our beliefs and judged accordingly. And, contrary to popular belief (pun intended), our beliefs are not absolute truths, although our brain would LOVE for us to think they are.

That doesn’t mean beliefs are bad! Beliefs give us the framework for how we understand and engage with the world around us. We need them to navigate life — beliefs give us structure and stability. They inform our core values and sense of purpose. They also save us time. They are part of our core operating system, the trusted programs that our mind and body use to act and respond quickly. That said, some of our beliefs are not helpful or healthy, and they can become outdated. It’s important that we audit and adjust our beliefs periodically, especially if we’re making decisions based on them… with a fishy attention span. Just sayin.

The more a belief is reinforced, the stickier it becomes. Rigid beliefs can also make it harder for us to grow and learn new things. Next time something trips your trigger, get curious. Ask yourself: What hot button belief did this hit? Is this belief useful? Does it make me happy? Does it help/hurt others? With awareness, mindfulness, and honesty we have the power to gracefully release outdated beliefs and upgrade. Everything is energy, including our beliefs. When we intentionally shift our beliefs, we can shift our energy and our reality – our health, well-being, relationships, actions, experiences, and even what we attract in the future.

Unsubscribe From Time

Speaking of the future, what we attract into our life experience depends on how we’re showing up now. Abhijit Naskar, neuroscientist and author, writes “...based on all our experiences, there is no actual existence of the past and the future. All that there is, is the present.” Albert Einstein has a lot to say about time too, including “...the distinction between past, present, and future is only a stubbornly persistent illusion." You don’t need to be a neuroscientist or physicist to grasp the concept – Life happens now. We need to be here for it.

Presence isn’t just showing up, it’s how we show up. It’s being fully in your life, right now. Not obsessing about the past or worrying about the future. Not on autopilot, not a zombie. When we’re present, we’re aware and highly alert, yet peaceful. Compulsive thoughts are not monopolizing our attention or causing conditioned emotional responses. Our thoughts are intentional, as opposed to random mental noise. We’re not bound to the past for our identity or bound to the future for our fulfillment.

When you’re present, you can make non-fishy decisions, rooted in awareness, attention, and reality. As a result, you don’t cause pain for yourself and others with unconscious responses, reactions, or resistance. When you’re present, your thoughts and emotions are anchored in accepting what is and taking action from a place of positivity or neutrality. You move forward with action based on clarity and intention vs. conditioned mental-emotional reactions. The new way of being I mentioned earlier… that starts with presence.

A New Way of Being

Being In Your Life: Cultivate a consistent meditation practice. Be aware of your thoughts and emotions, observing your conditioned responses. Let go of anything that isn’t helpful, healthy, or kind, including outdated habits and beliefs. And incorporate mindful breathing into your day. Even 1-5 minutes of breathwork will help you become more present and grounded. When your exhale is longer than your inhale, it lowers your stress response. When your inhale and exhale are of equal duration, it creates connection and coherence between your body and your mind. Start by lowering your stress, then shift to balanced, natural breath.

Being In The Flow: Everything is energy and energy needs to flow. Let it. Don’t fight life. Let it be what it is AND be intentional about what you take in and what you put out into the world. With every thought and emotion we have, every action we take, every word we use, and everything we consume, we are either consciously or unconsciously creating our reality. You know you’re in the flow when you feel ease, lightness, and focus that isn’t forced. Take a few moments to pause during the day, placing your attention on your heart, maybe even putting your hands there. Intentionally cultivate feelings of love, gratitude, and joy, as you find stillness and breathe. These feelings are not just warm fuzzies — they’re potent creative energy.

Being Who You (Really) Are: The question “Who am I?” is one of the most fundamental (and challenging) questions we ask ourselves. Are we just physical beings or is it possible that we're more? Are we spiritual beings having a physical experience? Is it possible that you’re not just a mash-up of mind, body, and emotion — that these are all amazing tools that you, the deeper you, your higher self, is using to have this life experience? Being in the world changes when you show up as a soul having a human experience. Remembering who you (really) are can transform your perspective and your reality, helping you gracefully navigate life’s ups, downs, and changes.

Being Free to Choose: Studies show that when we choose to be happy, we’re smarter, more motivated, and more successful. Happiness is a cause, not an result of getting what we think we want. We are all powerful creators and choice-makers. We choose where we place our time and energy. We choose what we think, feel, and do. How we speak to ourselves and others is also a choice. No one else can make these choices for us. How you experience each moment depends on you. This is not to say we should all be fake happy (gross). This is about a real mindset shift, leading with heart vs. ego. When you start to feel your own power to choose happiness, this realization is incredibly freeing.

The world is evolving, and it will continue to transform before our eyes. Fortunately, we can change too, and we’re all stronger and more adaptable and resourceful than we give ourselves credit for. Change starts when we wake up to the uncomfortable truth that no one is going to swoop in and save us from the shitstorm that’s now or the shitstorm that’s next – and when we realize that we all have the power to choose a new way of being, one where we can live well, work well, and BE well.

More to Explore

If you’re interested in learning more, I have a program called The PATH of Well-Being that goes deep into all of this (and then some). If you’re feeling stuck, burned out, or your inner voice is telling you something needs to change, check it out. Whether this program is for you (or not), all good! But, if you’re feeling more than a healthy level of stress, please let this be a gentle wakeup call to prioritize your well-being (for reals). It’s not a luxury, it’s a necessity. My heartfelt wish for you and everyone reading this is that you enjoy more ease and lightness and you find your path to living, working, and BEING well.

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